- Reviews

Kong – Skull Island A Drunk Review

It’s Hell in the Pacific!

That’s a big monkey.

Thomas Mann. World’s worst superhero.

I’ve seen some bad credit sequences recently. This is not one of those.

I like John Goodman. A lot. I always feel I’m in good hands with John Goodman. There are exceptions, but generally he’s good.

It’s interesting they’ve chosen the 70s. Maybe it’s the Faye Dunaway thing.


They seem to be trusting the audience to connect the dots about characters after some of the ‘on the nose’ stuff I’ve seen recently.

Those neon lights on the glass booth are really nice. Kind of brings the 1st and 3rd world in one image.

If ever they film The Honourable Schoolboy, I think Tom Hiddlestone is the man. I didn’t think he was tough enough before, but I think he could do it. I don’t think he was in Tinker, Taylor, Soldier, Spy, anyway, which is a plus. They won’t film it anyway, so…

If they ever do a film about thingy Robbins, the self help guy, the chap from this from Dead Man’s shows is (sorry) a shoe-in.

It’s Colonel Deckard in the A-Team (who, in the end, saw them for who they really are), not Colonel Packard.


Cliche warnings – a Vietnam soldier who is short, and letters from home, but to be fair, for a blockbuster, this film is doing a good job of building a group of three dimensional characters without resorting to telling as opposed to showing.

You do know, however, that at some point, King Kong will do the Punch Punch Roar thing that all monsters have to do now.

Music is good. Very good.

Oh. Deer.

Treemendous shot by King Kong.

Again, credit to the film makers. They’ve given the appearance of Kong the impact it should have. That moment between Samuel L Jackson and Kong wasn’t immense. That whole sequence was superb.

Guy from Boardwalk Empire rocks. It was indeed an unconventional encounter.

Did call it Kong as opposed to King Kong for the Vietnam connection?

That’s a big bison. What’s the difference between a buffalo and a bison? You can’t wash your hands in a buffalo (works better with a Black Country accent).

A Stargate!

Did King Kong ever have a mommy and a daddy?

My fiancee’s gran was Edgar Wallace’s nurse. Wonder what he’d make of the remakes. I think if he saw this he’d be happy.

Was that Mr Andrew Mrs Kong in that picture?

Does Samuel L Jackson have a fixed age, or can he change it at will?

John C Reilly rocks. Natural in comedy, but, if you watch Magnolia, a very good serious actor.

I found a lighter like that once, but I don’t know where it is. Maybe I lost it and someone else has it. Maybe it just travels the earth.

Wait. I don’t think they’d have built that wall with a river exit in mind.

Wait. Is there going to be a stupid coincidence? Please no. You’ve done well so far.

That boat reminds me of something from Star Wars, but I can’t remember what.

John C. Reilly is great. I know I’ve said it before, but he was just great again.

Two skeletons is not a mass grave, so no. You can’t recognise one.

Never smile at a crocodile. But click flash rather than tick tock.

I don’t recognise the photographer. I probably should. She’s good though. Not a generic token female or anything. She’s not had the ridiculous transition to a badass a lot characters like her would have. She doesn’t have much to work with but is doing it well (and that’s no dig at the scriptwriters either – it’s good they have tried to suddenly make her some kind of warrior her character wouldnt naturally become).

King Kong is not the only classic they’ve drawn from. They’ve thrown in Moby Dick and Apocalypse Now. I’d love to elaborate, but spoilers. Maybe over a beer.

Chekhov’s Revolver just turned up.

Was geeky engineer type told to watch the chap who wanted to be a sous chef in Apocalypse Now?

They didn’t do the crappy coincidence or punch punch roar! We’ll done. I really enjoyed this. Nice change from last three films.

Zuncho Mulbec-£5 from Asda. Ok. A little dry and a little bland, but what do you expect from a £5 wine?